Dad, Dames, Demons, and a Dwarf: My Trip Down Freedom Road

Muller's first book is part memoir and part three-ring circus, a mirror of his Chicago-based syndicated radio show, ""Mancow's Morning Madhouse."" With its rapid-fire, hyperventilating prose, it resembles a transcript of the motor mouth that made him famous rather than a coherent narrative, as Muller regales his readers with stories of prostitutes, stunts that go bad, pigeons blowing up and, incongruously, touching memories of his beloved late father. A lot of time gets spent on puerile, even offensive stuff--Muller brags of sleeping around (""If I put notches on my rifle for every woman I've been with I wouldn't have a gun anymore"") charging people money to look at his bowel movements, the benefits of fame (""success draws women like car grilles attract deer"") and his apparently rare ability to""pee in two streams."" In a section on traveling in Germany, he writes, ""As we eat our Big Mac breakfasts, I watch Berliners dipping fries in mayonnaise. Huh? Anyone who likes that swallows."" But despite Muller's crudeness, his stories can sometimes be affecting, showing some of the compassion that helped him become popular. During one of his shows, a paramedic calls in about to commit suicide, and Muller recounts how he tried to comfort him while a colleague called the police. When police find him""hanging from his belt in the paramedic van,"" Muller wonders, ""Did I let this man die? God forgive me. Anonymous voices on the radio, the last place he could reach for help."" Fans of the radio show will enjoy this peek into Muller's travels, his sexcapades, his shows and his radio life, and will be as startled as if they were listening to him live; other readers beware. B&w photos.