cover image On Intimate Terms: The Psychology of Difference in Lesbian Relationships

On Intimate Terms: The Psychology of Difference in Lesbian Relationships

Beverly Burch. University of Illinois Press, $24 (183pp) ISBN 978-0-252-01801-5

Complementarity is the essence of love, according to this analysis, which primarily explores lesbian relationships but examines heterosexual and gay relationships as well. Burch, a Berkeley, Calif., psychoanalyst, argues that some behavioral mechanisms both help bind people and help them grow: trying to see oneself as one's beloved sees one, for example, or projecting one's ``disowned'' impulses onto one's partner. She bases her findings on interviews with lesbian couples; she includes many eloquent quotations from these. In her view, a fundamental polarity governs lesbian relationships: the pairing of ``primary lesbians'' (those who have never had a relationship with a man) with bisexual women. She contends that differences in lesbian relationships are less apt to create conflict than in heterosexual relationships, for she believes women have a greater capacity to merge. Regardless of one's sexual orientation, there is much to learn here about the nature of love and its unconscious determinants. (Feb.)