Born to Please: Compliant Women/Controlling Men

``Me Phobia,'' the fear of displeasing a man and thus denying one's self, accentuates a man's ability to control the relationship, causing him not only to lose respect for the woman but to reject her, according to psychotherapist and Manhattan radio-personality Blaker. Men often exercise control over such ``pleasers'' by withholding love, affection and approval and by silence, she counsels. Based in part on her own experiences, the author here presents self-help guidelines using questionnaires and exercises plus a probing self-examination designed to assist women to understand the reasons for and to overcome their emotional dependency. Changing one's attitudes and engaging in new interests and activities, Blaker advises, will help to develop a woman's sense of identity and prepare her to renew a relationship or consider a new one on a basis of emotional equality. Author tour. (October)