How to Find Your (First) Husband

Slapdash superficiality is apparent from the opening scene of Blake’s flimsy contemporary. In a total failure of dialect, an American would-be dancer declares her intention to sell “prawns” to “punters.” That’s Mel, sidekick to the British heroine, Isobel Graves. Iz too aspires to stardom but currently works as an advertising mascot in L.A. Then she spots her dream man in the background of a news clip—a clip she’s watching because her dad is in the foreground. Undeterred by the Freudian implications, she bolts to Cornwall to track the dreamboat down. He’s Andrew Parker, whom Iz last saw being picked up from primary school by his mummy. He married and divorced Iz on the playground; now, age 29, she can’t forget this momentary domestic bliss. Like a Holmes-less Watson, she bumbles after him from L.A. to Cornwall to Singapore to Malaysia, often drunk, always baffled, and rarely without a lover to distract her. Part Bridget Jones and part Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, Iz’s travelogue wholly misses the mark, lacking any shred of genuine feeling. This is all surface patter, straining for silliness and one-liners, and romance readers will find nothing of interest in it. Agent: Clare Wallace, Darley Anderson (U.K.). (Nov.)