Love Is a Verb: How to Stop Analyzing Your Relationship and Start Making It Great!

Many of today's self-help books, according to this husband-and-wife psychotherapy team, try so hard to get readers to find out what's wrong with their relationships that they don't get around to showing them how to improve them. This theme is apparent in the first chapter's humorous title: ``The Codependent Cinderella Who Loves A Man Who Hates Women Too Much.'' By changing unworkable patterns, rewriting their ``stories'' (false beliefs) and focusing on the future rather than endless analysis of the past, declare Hanlon and Hudson, couples can make love more rewarding-in weeks or even days. Later chapters focus on destructive patterns like abusive behavior, gambling, etc.; ``healing rituals'' for unfinished business and reconnection; and intimacy and sex. Boxed key points concisely sum up each chapter, and examples from the authors' practice and own marriage lend credibility to this helpful self-help book. (Feb.)