Making Choices

The choices we make, asserts interior designer and McCall columnist Stoddard ( Grace Notes ) not only solve immediate problems but contribute to the shape of one's life. ``Your life and who you ultimately are is a step-by-step, choice-by-choice creation.'' Rather than listing specific decision-making rules, Stoddard offers guidelines, citing numerous examples from her own experiences and those of others concerning love, intergenerational family relationships, friendship and professional matters. With the exception of emergencies, when ``biting the bullet'' takes precedence over all other choices, the author stresses the need to resist pressure from others by learning to say ``no.'' She emphasizes that many decisions, such as that of having a child, affect other people. Her wise advice about selecting a mate warns against marrying merely to escape loneliness. Illustrations not seen by PW. Author tour. (Feb.)