Conversations at Midnight: Coming to Terms with Dying and Death

In 1989 Herbert Kramer, a communications consultant, was told he had terminal cancer; he died in April 1992. Written during the years following the diagnosis, this is the remarkable account of how he came to terms with death. What makes this work noteworthy is that it is the joint effort of the dying man and his wife, Kay, a Connecticut clinical social worker whose specialty is counseling terminally ill people. Some sections of this book were written by Herbert, others by Kay, and the rest is dialogue between the two. In these conversations the husband's spirits (and the reader's) are uplifted by his wife's wisdom. The couple discuss the nature of reality, death, love, the meaning of life and the quandaries faced by the dying, such as whether to allow the use of extraordinary measures to extend life. As described by Kay Kramer, Herbert Kramer's was a peaceful death for which he was ready. Reading this memoir one understands why. (Feb.)