The Archaeology of Loss: Life, Love, and the Art of Dying

In this vivid and moving memoir, archaeologist Tarlow (Harnessing the Power of the Criminal Corpse) dissects historical death rituals while navigating her own grief after her husband’s death. Following a long illness, Tarlow’s partner, Mark, died in 2016. In accessible, driving prose, she interweaves recollections of their 18-year relationship with descriptions of and meditations on burial processes she’s encountered in the archaeological field or read about in scholarly texts. “I do not feel awkward around bereaved people, nor have I ever felt unable to talk about my own grief,” Tarlow writes, but Mark’s illness pushed her to “the limits of my conversational ease.” After he died, she began to grow resentful of the expectation that she suppress unsavory feelings of anger or relief as she dealt with her loss. To process this discomfort, she buried herself in 15th- and 16th-century texts including Thomas Becon’s The Sick Mannes Salve and William Caxton’s The Arte and Crafte to Know Well to Dye, which turn over questions of pride and dignity in dying and offer tips on the “perfect death.” Thanks to these and other sources, Tarlow was reminded that her experiences existed on a long continuum. The result is a refreshingly tough-minded—but still tender—alternative to standard grief memoirs. Agent: Kirsty McLachlan, Morgan Green Creatives. (Oct.)