When I Was Red Clay: A Journey of Identity, Healing, and Wonder

Conservation photographer Bailey (Rock Art) contends with his troubled Mormon upbringing and relationship to the natural world in this meditative memoir composed of journal entries, essays, and poems. The author, who was shunned by his community and family for being gay, recalls painful memories of a 1990s childhood in which classmates intimidated him with concealed weapons and physical assaults. At home, Bailey found little refuge living with an anorexic mother and a father who demanded that Bailey renounce his sexuality or be punished eternally. In lyrical odes to the natural beauty of the southwestern deserts, Bailey details his turn to nature for respite with an emphasis on the ancient rock art he encountered in his explorations. He also, however, draws facile connections between his Mormon ancestors’ experience to that of contemporary undocumented Mexican migrants crossing the militarized U.S. border (“Our feet were burned red under these same soils... for the same sense of safety sought by migrants entering this country today”), often leading his reflections on freedom and religious identity to ring hollow. Though some fragments struggle to cohere, Bailey’s moving testament of resilience is sure to satisfy readers of nature writing and autobiography alike. Fans of Terry Tempest Williams and Robin Wall Kimmerer should take note. (Aug.)