Mind Whispering: A New Map to Freedom from Self-Defeating Emotional Habits

Blending cognitive psychology, Eastern philosophy, neuroscience, and lessons from the animal kingdom, psychotherapist Bennett-Goleman (Emotional Alchemy) outlines the destructive thought patterns that beget emotional instability, and offers solutions for changing them. After defining the most common negative core beliefs—e.g., subjugation, or the sense that “my wishes and feelings don’t count”; unlovability, the belief that one is essentially defective; and fear of abandonment—the author teaches readers to pinpoint their triggers, recognize damaging mental habits, counteract knee-jerk reactions, decide upon a healthier response, and assert oneself in a productive way. “Sometimes a perspective shift is all it takes to change your reaction,” she opines. As is the case with most self-help books of this sort, that’s easier said than done. But Bennett-Goleman is nevertheless a clear and capable guide. In addition to her treatment of the individual, she also turns a lens on the world at large, advising readers on how to apply these principles to intimate relationships as well as everyday encounters with coworkers, friends, and strangers, and provides suggestions for how to feel empathy for others struggling with their own self-defeating behaviors. A thought-provoking and practical way to reassess one’s emotional life. Agent: Linda Loewenthal, David Black Agency. (May)