Dateable: Swiping Right, Hooking Up, and Settling Down While Chronically Ill and Disabled

Essayist Slice and minister Cupp (coauthors of the picture book This Is How We Play) team up for a noteworthy relationship guide for disabled people. Drawing on personal experience (Slice’s dysautonomia began at 28, and Cupp was born with cerebral palsy) and enlightening interviews with people across the ability spectrum, the authors tackle such challenges as disclosing one’s disability on dating apps, discussing caregiver duties with partners, and having sex in spite of physical limitations. The guidance takes a flexible rather than prescriptive approach—for instance, the chapter on sex advises readers to “expand what sex means” beyond penetrative intercourse and experiment with new strategies, positions, and devices. Other sections explore the intersection between disability and queerness and the higher incidence of sexual assault against disabled people. Throughout, the authors are candid about the difficulties of dating in a society that prizes “spontaneity... and effortlessness” yet is riddled with access limitations for those with disabilities. With plenty of useful tips, stories, and encouragement for readers to fashion their own approaches, this is a valuable resource. (July)