Self Help: This Is Your Chance to Change Your Life

Bestseller Bernstein (Happy Days) outlines in this so-so manual how readers can use the Internal Family Systems psychological model to manage their emotions. Developed by Richard Schwartz, the model contends that the mind comprises multiple “parts” that relate to each other much like members of a family. When triggered, two parts prove especially troublesome: “exiles,” which carry the “weight of our past negative experiences” and activate feelings of inadequacy, shame, or terror; and “protectors,” which unleash defense mechanisms to shield the mind from those feelings. Over an extended period of time, suppressed pain fuels harmful coping mechanisms like defensiveness, addiction, isolation, and anxiety that spark more distress. To break that cycle, readers are encouraged to investigate a part’s feelings, thoughts, or experiences, ask what it needs (generally “to feel safe, seen, and supported”), and then attempt to tap into one’s “resourced, calm, loving” true nature to lead the part back to safety. Bernstein buttresses her advice with admirably candid disclosures, including how she grappled with addiction and suicidal postpartum depression, though the IFS model is described using a surfeit of complicated detail likely to overwhelm the layperson. In a crowded field, this is unlikely to stand out. (Dec.)