Paleg and McKay, practicing clinical psychologists and coauthors of Couple Skills, pinpoint pain and a resulting sense of helplessness as the roots of anger. By outlining individuals' and couples' basic cycles of hurt and anger, the authors expose the cracks in the armor and the methods of breaking the cycles. Focusing on preventing escalation, managing anger when it arises and repairing the situation after an old pattern takes hold, they espouse a one-day-at-a-time process of swearing off anger (via tension-release exercises, practicing empathy and identifying defensiveness), learning de-escalation tools (a Repair Checklist, an Anger Coping Plan) and regaining trust (by changing speech habits and concertedly giving pleasure). (Nov.)
