Shame-Sex Attraction: Survivors’ Stories of Conversion Therapy

The contributors to this harrowing collection of firsthand accounts of conversion therapy “were subjected to dehumanizing practices that sought their erasure,” writes editor Wilson, a former evangelical who is himself a survivor of conversion therapy. Labeled as suffering from “rapid-onset gender dysphoria,” contributors were told they had caught “a social contagion”—or, in some cases, been possessed by a demon. Forced to participate in horrid “therapies” that ranged from ridiculous aversion exercises (collecting dog feces and smelling it while looking at pictures of people of the same sex to induce vomiting) to torturous onstage “cleansings” during which they were violently restrained, the contributors report that they suffered a damaged sense of self, many to the point of suicidal ideation and suicide attempts. Many of the stories exemplify how conversion therapy is a mental torture so strong that it has ramifications on the physical health of those subjected to it (“The last three months had taken a great toll on my health. One afternoon in early May, I decided to go for a hike among the rolling hills. As I ascended one particularly steep hill I was stopped by a sharp pain in my chest. Gasping and clutching my chest, unable to breathe, I sat down on the hillside expecting to die right then and there”). It’s a heartbreaking and galvanizing exposé. (Jan.)