PW spoke by telephone with Fred Rogers, who is as patient, thoughtful and kind in conversation as he appears on TV.
PW: Why did you write The Mister Rogers Parenting Book, and why now?
Fred Rogers: Oh, I don't think it's any kind of a valedictory. It's just all of the helpful insights that child development has given us through the years. I've had so many wonderful professors. And the ones that to me were the best were the ones who could take very difficult subjects and make them accessible to everyone, as I hope that this book does.
When you start out being a parent you're so afraid that you're going to make a mistake here and there. It's seems to me that the best thing we can do is to give our children our honest selves. With a little help, like this parenting book, I think that our honest self can show through, and we needn't be so worried about saying exactly the right thing and doing exactly the right things. Because each one of us is unique.
PW: It's a common assumption that a lot of parents these days don't know how to set rules in a workable way. Either they're overindulgent, or the kids seem to be constantly testing the rules, or ignoring them. What do you think?
FR: I keep thinking that if a child runs out into the street, and nobody runs out to get that child, or screams "Don't do that! Come back!" that child gets the idea that nobody cares about him. It's as basic as that. If we don't give children limits, they eventually come to feel that we don't love them. I've always found that was helpful for parents to hear.
PW: What kind of publicity are you doing for the book?
FR: They ease me into things. You know, I'm a fairly private person and I enjoy the work that I do and I like to get to know people, but I'm not keen about being on display.
PW: You've picked a curious career for a private person.
FR: [Laughter]. Well, that's absolutely right. But when I'm in studio, and look in the camera, I think of a kind of aggregate one child—all the children I have known. Television is a very personal medium. Martha McFarland, who is one of our great mentors, used to say that it's one of the most personal media she had ever seen in her life. She's in heaven now. She was a good deal older than we, her students. She was a great observer of children, and to her the television screen was analogous to the mother's face in infancy. She observed young kids, how carefully they watched a person's face on the screen. They often wanted something to eat while they were watching. She said that for the very youngest child at either the breast or the bottle, [looking at TV is like] looking up at the mother's face—that's why television producers and purveyors have such an enormous responsibility.
PW: How did you wind up at Running Press?
FR: That's a very good verb, "wound up." Because we've had associations with others that one might say were a lot bigger, but we really enjoy the personal care that the people at Running Press give. They obviously care about their readers. And so do we. I would much rather have 1,000 people buy this book and use it well than 100,000 people buy it and toss it in the bin. Because you work hard on things like this. This book was not just a year in the making, this book was 50 years in the making.
PW: You are a cultural icon. What does that feel like?
FR: I've just always been myself. The most important thing for me is to be in touch with one other person in a meaningful way. Maybe that's why people have embraced our work. I think people long to know that they are loveable and capable of loving. I was in Houston last week, and practically everybody at the airport, particularly the people who check you through with those Geiger counters or whatever they are, they all stopped me. And told me what it meant to grow up with The Neighborhood.
PW: What do you think we should do in the world to bring peace in the world?
FR: I think it can come only through long and concentrated measures of justice. Justice doesn't mean just handing down some decision that helps one corporation over another. Justice in my book means taking care of those who cannot take care of themselves.
PW: That's not the answer I expected.
FR: That's the best thing about conversations, we all get stretched, and we get things to think about when the conversation ends. I wish you well in all that you do.
